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Get a Tumblr. Much better.

Obama won.

You have NO idea how fucking excited I am. I cried like a proud parent, and I'm still crying. His speech was beautiful. He is beautiful. And as corny as it sounds, so is America. This is the first time I have ever really, truly been proud to be an American. This is the first time I've ever cared. Everything is changing, and I want to be a part of it. This is it. I'm patching things up and staying positive. If there is a time for change, it's now.
- I went back to Springfield last weekend. It was really nice, surprisingly. I shaved my head while I was there, too. This time it was for reasons less admirable. I got to see Shelby, Lily, Tim and Sarah, which was wonderful. It's good to know I'm remembered and missed.
- I've been hanging out in Irving Park a lot. The people at the Phrat Farm make me feel welcome. It's wonderful to know I have a place I can go to and be welcome 24/7, especially since I haven't been sleeping much lately. I really hope to get to know everyone better.
- Have Heart is this Sunday. I'm so excited. I know I'll be an awkward, nervous wreck the whole time, but it will be worth it. If it wasn't for their music, I would have gone completely nuts up here already.
- Over Christmas break, I'm going to Los Angeles with my dad to celebrate my Great Aunt Mary's birthday and to check out UCLA. Their photography department looks nice, from what I've seen. If I like it, I'll probably live with either my Uncle Ray or Aunt Mary in Glendale, which is a suburb of L.A.
- I already have my next two tattoos planned out. Yes, I am addicted, but every tattoo that I get means something to me. I would NEVER get something just because it looks cool. That's just not me.

Ignore the acne.
Highlights of this week:
- I dyed my hair dark brown. (As seen above.) I just wasn't feeling the red this time around.
- MY BABY TURTLES CAME! Since I spent over $100, they threw in a free turtle? So, I have two baby boy Mississippi Map turtles and one boy Red-Eared Slider. They're so fucking cute. I was squealing and prancing around all day Friday like a 5 year old. I named the red-eared one Donatello, and Mikey named one of the twins Pirahna. Still debating on what to name the last one. Pirahna is obviously the cutest. He'll swim up to the filter and do flips. The others just bask all the time.
- My cupcake beanie, toof earrings, (as seen above) and forget-me-knot ring came in the mail too. Thank you FredFlare!
- This song. (Hear You Breathe- Who Cares). I started crying after I heard it. It just triggered something. I haven't stopped listening to it since. Seriously. I even made a CD just for that song so I could listen to it in the shower.
- TOM SAID HI TO ME IN THE CAFETERIA! That sounds really fucking lame, but it meant the world to me. He's my friend from Writing and Rhetoric (the one with the $90 laser pointer). It was so refreshing. Most people that I see outside of class never acknowledge me, but he did.

I wish I was the most beautiful human being you have ever met.

I am: blessed, happy, hungry, curious, afraid.

I am ultimately alive.
I am ultimately dying.
Ultimately, I'm just trying to put everything together before my finger prints are erased.

If you can't look at yourself in the mirror and admit to your downfalls, then you have no right to point mine out.
I know what I am, my mistakes. I've chosen to embrace them. Denial gets you no where. I don't point my fingers at other people because I know my hands are not clean.

No matter how many times you wash yourself, there was dirt there at one time.

You are the only person who you can change. Why spend your time trying to change someone else, then dying, being no different then you were in the begining?

I want to leave knowing I've tasted it all. Every flavor has been given a chance.

someone come taste the vineyards with me. Life has so many flavors, just like wine.

Let's try what we can. If we don't like the taste, ask for another sample. By the time we are done, we will have savored it all, good and bad. Without one, how can you be familiar with the other?

I've given up trying. I can't even share my silly dreams without you shutting me down.

We swang for a half an hour in silence, watching the sun set.
"You know what?" I asked
"What?"
"I've always wanted to sneak out here in the dead of the night and go swinging. Just swing and sing as loud as I want."
"That's not safe, not at night."

I bit my tongue until we got home so I wouldn't cry. If I did let myself cry, you'd have no idea why I was upset. That's what hurts the most.